Grace in the Wind
I have found this season to be a time of rest and "unpeopling". I finished up my university studies for 2021 in mid-December and still had to work until December 22nd. On the 23rd I just sat in my chair and rested. As many in my school district had struggled with THE sickness, loss of family members, and many other calamities in 2021 I just struggled with exhaustion. With a mild sinus infection I just sat like Molly in the above photo, and stared into space.
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| Rose Sunday, "Rejoice the Lord is near." |
On December 24th I was at the church creating beauty for worship. December 12, Rose Sunday was our last full service. Many in our parish had gotten sick and after that Sunday I still felt devotion to continue to adorn the altar for the Lord even if only two of us were present for service.
" For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."
(Matthew 18:20, KJV)
The lights burned on. We had the traditional service of "Carols and Scripture" on Christmas Eve and a deacon gave us the sacraments on Christmas day. The following week I was either at the church or resting in my apartment. About 3 days after Christmas I felt like reading and picked up my book choice for 2021. 
She doesn't always sit staring at my Christmas loot with the Nativities sets. Mostly, she sits in her tree and watches outside. (I think she also sleeps at least 18 hours a day.) It has been nice to have 2 weeks off from school and kid stuff to rest and heal my sinuses. On Monday we return for a day of in-service and then the kiddos will be back on Tuesday morning. Masking up and hearing the tales of Christmas break is what I have to look forward to on January 11th. Another week and my university classes will kick in and off we go until the next school break.
In October I had seen an interview by Anthony Doerr about his latest book and I bought it that day. It was over 600 pages and I was still working, preparing to teach an after school craft club in November and December and taking 12 university units. I got through half the book and it sat on my night stand for nearly 2 months. Once my exhaustion and sinus infection were settling down I walked back into the book and closed the door.
Sometime near New Years I closed the cover and felt this was one of best contemporary novels that I have read in a long time. I love history, geography, and a good old fashion "who done it?" This book had all of that with many character studies.
I got my final grades for the year and had completed 31 units by taking summer school this year. My hope is to have my teaching degree for Transitional Kindergarten through 8th grade in 2023. Meanwhile, I am signed up for 12 more units in the Spring semester which begins January 17th.
Word for the Year
My word for the year of 2021 was KINDNESS. I watched a video last Christmas break The Antidote that spoke to my heart about the need for kindness in our world. My school secretary has a life theme of Kindness. I didn't try to imitate her, but I wanted to be a kinder and more gentler version of myself in 2021. Unfortunately, I lost my word and had to look up the email that I sent the principal a year ago to see what word I had used. The year before is was "Study" and that was easy to understand. Kindness was a deeper word that needed practice and patience with myself. I hope my friends and colleagues will say that I am kinder than I was a year ago.
My one word for 2022 is "Grace." Grace as a noun is the unmerited gift of God in our Lord Jesus whereby HE saves us from our sins through HIS blood on the cross. He gave me grace and I am to extend that grace to others. However, HE also says to treat others with the love we give ourselves. Well, I wrote before that giving myself love has been a problem. A problem of feeling unworthy of other's love and in turn not loving myself.
So, in 2022 I plan to give myself grace as well as give more grace to others. If 2021 taught me anything is was "We all need to give each other more grace." While I was pondering this one word thing for 2022 I ran across a video clip from Sunday Morning on CBS.
"Let's be patient, let's be forgiving, let's be understand that we all fail to be impeccable."
Faith Salie's words spoke to my heart about what I want to be in 2022. I have heard people say, "Oh no, it can't be 2020- too." No my friend it is 2020-two! 2020 was a year that turned our world upside down. I had to look at my work-acholic habits and tell myself, "It is okay to rest."
In 2021 I learned that I have a lot more to learn. I lost a few good friends in the last year. They aren't really lost, they are in heaven. I was given a grandson in 2021 and in a short time a baby girl will grace our family. My prayer for these two latest grandchildren is that they will show grace and be given grace as they grow into the people that God has for them to become.
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| Christmas Morning |
Christmas morning is about the Grace of God coming down to earth to save us. For over 2,000 years that Grace has been extended to humankind. A dear friend went to heaven yesterday. We share our birthday blessing the first Sunday of August each year. He was 30 years older and I pray I will be as grace-filled as he was until dementia took him away from us this last year. I shed tears, but know the hope that was in him and his family is holding onto right now.
So, 2022 I don't have a resolution. Yes, I will try to eat healthier, exercise more, fill the hummingbird feeder on time...I will be taking a full load of university classes, working, and tutoring. My church duties will be more than I can honestly imagine as we host the Synod this May. I told the children in my craft class, "Your limitation is only your imagination." I have a lot of creating to achieve in 2022.
Meanwhile, I will give myself grace. Grace to rest when I feel the need. Grace to fail and pick myself up again. No longer will I expect myself to be perfect or anyone else in my world. As an "essential worker" these past two years I have been told over and over to take care of myself. "Selfcare" is a word that is over used in the face of exhaustion. For everyone it is different. For one person it is chocolate and naps. For another it is a facial and manicure. For me it is quietly setting in my chair looking at the world from Molly's view.
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| Molly's Cat "Christmas" Tree |
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| Molly's view |
My wish for you dear reader, is that you will know Grace from God and give yourself grace too.
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